My life in graphs #Sarcoidosis

August 25, 2017 in Games, Rants, VRUnicorns

Spent a year on steroids and finally took the last dosage this Sunday before getting fresh blood tests taken on Monday. I had hoped both numbers had gone super much down by now, but taking into account that I was on 10-20 mg of steroids during the other tests and on 0 steroids now, I guess I should just suck it up and be happy that numbers aren’t too crazy. I just wish my immune system would be doing something useful instead of making up shit like this. Oh well, back to working on #SkiJump, so we can ship that game this year! About bloody damn time some would say.

#PickYourPoison

May 29, 2017 in Random, VRUnicorns

Sarcoidosis is a bitch. Neurosarcoidosis is even bitchier. I’m slowly phasing off steroids and am currently on 10 mg. Steroids worked quite well on my overall condition when I was on higher dosage than now, but doctors don’t like that I take them much longer (been going 10 months on/off) and I’m still in the middle of tests for Neurosarcoidosis as Danish healthy is messy these days…waiting lists and IT problems…but at least it’s free (although I’m trying to fast track by paying private hospitals on the side). I can live with the lung Sarcoidosis being untreated as I’m only stage 2 and already have scar tissue, so it might have stopped progressing. I want answers and I would like to ‘move on’ with my life and the psychological part of ‘being sick’ is driving me crazy. It doesn’t fit well with my hypermind and my wish to make and ship a bunch of more VRUnicorns games this year. The damn part about Sarcoidosis is that it’s rare and there is very little knowledge about its appearance, progression and remission. So no answers for me on hospitals…just tests and monitoring. So I feel trapped in my own body. At least I don’t have ‘visible’ symptoms, so I look healthy when I look myself in the mirror. Running joke when I visit the hospitals is ‘that I look so well for a Sarcoidosis patient’ and I can fake being well when I sometimes leave my beach exile and venture into the real world…for a short while. Then the symptoms catch up again and I need to escape and recover. My treatment options are narrowed down to various immunosuppressive drugs (and I keep swimming in the ocean every day…cause that’s still the best pain medication and I refuse to take more poison). It’s pretty much all chemo…and all those drugs and potential side effects scare the hell out of me. Hoping to have a diagnosis on the Neurosarcoidosis soon, so I know whether I can avoid them drugs or have to start considering myself as a ‘real’ patient. Most of these drugs have visible side effects and I’m worried that they will make me ‘realize’ that I’m sick and have a huge impact on my mental health. One thing is having low energy, pain and struggling with work and straight thinking because my brain goes foggy, but losing my hair and getting rashes will definitely not help on positive thinking and trying to fight away the depression that usually hits when the Sarcoidosis takes over. Those times when I think to myself: “I used the be fun” and try to laugh. Luckily mood is fairly high right now, but I worry for when I get under 10 mg. My mantra has always been ‘mind over body’ as I’m born hypermobile and have been working out like a horse since that was diagnosed as a teenager to get away having to much trouble from that. Seems like my body is trying to win over my mind this time around. And damn I hate it.

GDC TIME

February 23, 2017 in Games, Love, VRUnicorns

BAM!!! Have been on steroids since November and finally got back to work part time in January…steroids dosage was increased in February and I’ve now made it to GDC to demo our two new games in Valve’s booth together with 3 of the other unicorns. High as a kite and need to stick to a pretty insane exercise schedule to keep the sarcoidosis symptoms down, but at least I can work again! And mood is high ;-)

Sarcoidosis

October 15, 2016 in Bandello, Games, Love, VRUnicorns

I’ve been sick as a dog for a while. I survived Gamescom by being on a high dosage of steroids (provided by one of the many hospitals I’m frequenting since months) and have been off steroids for a month while the hospitals are doing more tests on me. I got the actual diagnosis this week and they can now confirm that it’s sarcoidosis after running some pretty heavy cancer tests to exclude lung cancer. I have various symptoms and am currently off steroids, so I feel like the ghost of my usual #ChickenBitch persona. I clearly can’t run the VRUnicorns teams at the same time as battling this, so luckily I have this super skilled brother (I actually have two and this is my youngest older brother…9 years my senior) and he heads up Apex Game Tools who we are sharing our Copenhagen office with. So him and his team have stepped in and are now working together with the rest of the VRUnicorns.

Quick facts on me & my brother, Jake:

I started stealing from him when I was 3 years old, I fried his C64 and I always put the blame on him when I got in trouble as a kid. And I’ve pretty much been this destructive since I joined the family. This 8 mm short film clearly shows my behavorial pattern – note that I first hit my oldest brother with a stick and later make Jake trip over my racket.

Luckily my brother is a very forgiven fella, is super smart and has good human skills (unlike myself), so I know the VRUnicorns are in great hands while I focus on getting well…bloody damn hope to get back on steroids soon, cause #FuckThisShit (reference to my lovely friend Sara).

Unite Europe 2016 Panel

August 29, 2016 in Bandello, Games, Love, Shayla Games, VRUnicorns

#IndieLyfe

June 22, 2016 in Bandello, Games, Love, Nordic Game Jam, VRUnicorns

Quick ‪#‎RealityCheck‬ for the peeps who think indie development is a piece of cake. My 2 cents: team up with the right people – skills+execution (avoid ‘idea guys’), give a lot of freedom, make decisions based on part guts/part rationality, pivot if you’re stuck, cut drama early (constructive criticism is good – destructive primadonnas are poison to a team) and jam like crazy. MOST IMPORTANT: Scope. Hence the jamming…if you know how to jam then you know how to scope. ‪#‎EverydayIsJammingDay‬

This post was inspired by this Rolling Stones article and previous experience with drama queens as team mates. Team VRUnicorns is a blast as we are all jammers doing this for the gamezzzz!

#SelfieTennis @GDC

March 9, 2016 in Bandello, Games, Love, VRUnicorns

Two years ago at GDC, I demoed my first VR game to Valve. One year ago at GDC, I tried the HTC Vive for the first time in Valve’s booth. This year, Horatiu, Milan and I are demoing #SelfieTennis in Valve’s booth at GDC. THIS IS BLOODY AMAZING!!!!! I’M FLYING WITH UNICORNS AND RIDING ON RAINBOWS. BEST GDC EVER COMING UP!!! #SelfieTennis is our first game as @VRUnicorns and is made in collaboration with Andy Schönau and Simon Post.

VRUnicorns – #SelfieTennis

February 9, 2016 in Bandello, Games, Love, VRUnicorns


VRUnicorns – #SelfieTennis from VRUnicorns on Vimeo.